


His Love

by LokianaWinchester



Category: Venom (Movie 2018)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Feelings, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, Hurt/Comfort, Kissing, M/M, Nightmares, Other, hand-holding
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-08
Updated: 2018-11-08
Packaged: 2019-08-20 10:33:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16554131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LokianaWinchester/pseuds/LokianaWinchester
Summary: Usually, they get through their days adequately, no major incidents, no suspicious behaviour. They have a set of rules now and to Eddie’s surprise, these rules are actually being upheld by both of them. They are working, functioning in symbiosis.But the nights are bad. At night, the fears bubble up.





	His Love

**Author's Note:**

> I hope y'all monsterfuckers are also monsterLOVERS because this is about Feelings.

Eddie is not in the best state of mind. He has not been for a long time. Ever since Anne broke up with him, his life has continuously spiralled out of control more and more. But even before, when they were still together, he had not been at his very best. Looking back, it seemed impossible that he sunk so low as to hack into Anne’s email account, and yet here he is. Having broken the trust of the woman he loved and his own heart. What an absolute moron he is.

 _Here I am_ , he thinks again. He has survived the worst couple of months in his entire life and things are finally looking up. He has hoped that this time would come, or rather, he has known it, because realistically he could not live forever the way he has in these past months. One way or the other he had to get better. He expected this, without thinking of how, really, which was probably the reason why he was stuck in that situation for so long. But one thing he never would have guessed, was that his life would take a turn for the better when an alien started to co-inhabit his body.

It makes sense in a weird way, that the Symbiote would effectively help him. After all, as long as Eddie is okay, they are okay as well. It is not so complicated, if he is being honest, and yet sometimes Eddie gets headaches from contemplating their symbiosis. He has learned to roll with it though, not to think about the ‘how’s and ‘why’s in too much detail. It is the only way to stay sane.

At times it is hard to stay sane, when all you want to do is to rip somebody’s head off, knowing that those are not your own instincts. It is hard to stay sane when you are going about your day and suddenly your view goes blank with memories that are not yours, because the alien in your head saw something triggering.

It is hard to stay sane when you have twice the mental illnesses, twice the insecurities and infinitely more of a desire to eat people’s heads than the general population.

Sometimes Eddie really, really doubts that he can return to a normal life. A life that involves a steady job with an income he can actually live off, a nice place, friends...

He is lonely. Even though he is never alone these days, Eddie is lonely. He yearns for something the Symbiote cannot give him, but he cannot put his finger on what.

For now, he needs to get his act together. Eddie’s body may have adapted to symbiosis, but his mind is still confused, and not only consciously. Eddie feels as though his unconscious is restless, trying to figure out the presence  at the back of his mind. Or maybe that is the Symbiote themselves, maybe that is just how it feels and Eddie is going to have to get used to it.

It is unnerving.

Sleeping is by far the worst; usually, they get through their days adequately, no major incidents, no suspicious behaviour. They have a set of rules now and to Eddie’s surprise, these rules are actually being upheld by both of them. They are working, functioning in symbiosis.

But the nights are bad. At night, the fears bubble up. Eddie used to be good at suppressing bad memories. This ability is what got him through most of his life, but now he seems to have lost this filter. Maybe in letting somebody co-inhabit his mind, he has given up those boundaries. It is not that Eddie wants to keep these things from his Symbiote, but he would simply like to sleep peacefully again. Preferably sometime soon. It is not like those bad memories are only his own. Sometimes it feels like he needs to work through all of his Symbiote’s problems for them as well. It is endlessly tiring. Sleep should not generally be tiring; it makes life a real terror to get through, Eddie has noticed.

His nightmares rank from ridiculous to horrific; he sets them onto a scale from ‘ _I break all my bones, but they snap right back together, elastic like rubber, only to break again’_ to ‘ _I get shot and this time my Symbiote is not there. They leave me to bleed out, the back of my mind is empty_.’

When Eddie sits up with a gasp, sweat-soaked and out of breath, it takes him a moment to realise that what really terrified him about the dream was not his death; he dreamed of dying before; no. What made this dream stand out was the clear absence of the Symbiote.

Immediately, he speaks up, unsure, even though he can feel their presence enveloping his mind.

“You there?” His voice is rough. He wonders if he screamed in his sleep.

 **Always** , his Symbiote replies, voice rumbling through Eddie’s head, and it does wonders to calm him down. Maybe his Other is intentionally altering his bodily functions, but within a minute, Eddie’s heart stops racing, he starts to feel less dizzy, more grounded, safe.

“Thank you,” he says.

All the Symbiote does, is hum in acknowledgement.

The nightmares don’t stop after that; in fact, they become more frequent, and although they are never quite the same, there is one consistency; his Other is not with Eddie.

* * *

Eddie is running; he is not sure where to, exactly. Maybe he is not running towards anything at all, he feels like he is being chased, suddenly. His skin is crawling with the sense of being watched and he calls out for his Other.

“What’s going on?” They always know. But there is no reply.

“Answer me!” he shouts, voice high-pitched with panic. Not again. How did they get separated? Eddie feels the presence at the back of his head.

“Why are you ignoring me?” he whispers between hectic breaths.

**You can’t run from me.**

Not his. That Symbiote is not his. Eddie feels his legs giving out beneath him. He knows this voice.

He falls; the ground is hard, cold, and Eddie has no control over his limbs.

“Riot,” he manages to choke out. He wants to scream for help, but his voice is being taken too. He is completely at Riot’s mercy.

 _Why?_ he thinks, as he feels sharp claws digging into his back, piercing his skin. He screams, or he wants to, arches off the ground in pain. But there is no sound, not even air leaving his lips.

 _Why?_ Eddie thinks again. He hears bones cracking, feels excruciating pain. The last thing he feels is Riot’s hot, wet breath against his neck.

* * *

Eddie sits up, a scream is still echoing through the room. His shirt is sweat-soaked, clinging to him and he rips it off. It restricts him, he needs to breathe, breathe. Breathe.

He feels like he cannot. Breathe. **Breathe**.

_How?_

**Breathe**.

**In, out, in, out.**

Eddie does.

**In. Out.**

He pants out the breath, a sob runs through him, shaking his whole body.

**In.**

His head starts to clear.

**Out.**

“Fuck,” Eddie shouts and scrambles to his feet, stumbling. He barely catches himself, but manages to steady himself against the side of the bed. “Get away from me, get away, fuck!” The presence in his mind is suffocating him, he knows it’s _his_ Symbiote, but it feels bad, the sensation is bad, rotten, _Riot_. He cannot think rationally right now.

“Get the fuck away from me!” Eddie shouts again. The Symbiote withdraws. Eddie is not sure where to, or how.

He starts pacing across the room.

To the door and back.

To the door and back.

His head starts to clear with his body distracted.

“Fuck,” he mutters again. “Fuck, _fuck_!”

The emptiness of his mind is freeing and unsettling at the same time. He could not stand his Other’s presence, but he is not used to being separated. Eddie sits down at the edge of his bed.

**Please.**

They are back. Still barely noticeable, but the question is obvious. Perhaps they just hid themselves within Eddie.

He hesitates for a long moment.

“Okay.”

The familiar sensation of his Other forming from Eddie’s own skin, is calming him down considerably.

A glance at his hands, reveals his Symbiote’s form; hands emerging from Eddie’s forearms, fingers caressing the back of his hands. Slowly, Eddie unclenches his fists; his Other’s fingers twine between his own, reassuring him, the gesture tender and intimate.

Eddie wishes he could lean into this touch and not a second later, his Symbiote is enveloping his back, taking control of his posture so he could relax. The sensation is exquisite.

“I’m sorry,” he whispers.

**I know.**

“I dreamed that it was Riot with me. I couldn’t... I couldn’t stand having you there. I’m sorry.”

 **It’s okay** his Other says, voice deep, controlled, reassuring. Maybe too much so.

“It’s not. I shouldn’t have pushed you away.”

**Yes. But you did and now you can’t change it.**

They were hurt. Because of Eddie.

“I’m sorry. I won’t do it again.”

Silence.

The Symbiote’s head materialises next to Eddie’s; feeling their breath against his neck sends cold shivers through Eddie, his hands clench around his Other’s. But his panic is quenched immediately, by a sense of _together_. A sense of _right_.

Eddie sighs and turns to look at them.

 **Thank you** they say. The Symbiote’s voice is softer than Eddie has ever heard it. Without thinking, he leans in.

The kiss lasts a second only, before Eddie pulls back.

“I’m sorr-”

 **“You want this.”** His Other’s voice is inside his mind and outside as well, surrounding Eddie, overwhelming. He swallows. The Symbiote already knows what he wants; Eddie can feel it.

“Yes.” His voice is weak, his tone soft. But it is the truth.

Before he knows it, the Symbiote has thrown him onto the bed, is pressing him into the mattress, hands still holding Eddie’s. Their touch is electrifying now, emotions running through Eddie at high-speed. He is not sure if they are his or those of his Other.

Eddie is looking up at them, closing his eyes when they lean down, taking control of the situation, as they have already taken control of Eddie.

The next kiss is more intense; but there is more than the physical aspect to it. Eddie is completely surrounded by his Other, a comforting presence, caring, loving.

Their emotions are clashing, then melting together under the heat of the kiss, into something that feels like it is too big to be contained by them. Eddie arches up into the kiss, but a weight at his waist presses him down.

Somehow – he is yet again not entirely sure of the how’s and ‘why’s – the Symbiote is straddling him and it does nothing to lessen Eddie’s emotions.

 **Because you like it** they say in his mind, while their tongue does things to Eddie’s mouth and sanity, which he cannot quite comprehend.

But he does. He likes it enormously.

They break the kiss eventually, and Eddie lets his head fall back into the pillow.

“Wow,” he breathes out. So this is what he has been missing.

 **Hmmm** is all the Symbiote has to say about the matter. They nestle their head into the crook of Eddie’s neck.

Their eyes are almost completely closed, a wave of comfort, care, affection washes over Eddie and he realises they are not just his own emotions, but those of his Other. His Love.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading, I hope you liked it. If so, please leave me kudos/comments! They literally make my existence on earth enjoyable.  
> 


End file.
